I’m working in the backyard, stretched out on the patio sofa with my laptop perched on my legs, when the text pops up on my phone.

Hi Ashlee! Are you or Brett heading over to get Presley?

It’s 12:08pm, and I’m still in pajamas.

Twenty minutes ago, I saw Brett walk out of the Tuff Shed, aka our home office, presumably to pick up our daughter from kindergarten—per our arrangement. I did drop-off. He was in charge of pick-up.

I slam my computer shut and practically sprint the five steps to the house, flinging open the sliding glass door to the sight of Brett sitting on the couch … (wait for it) … watching ESPN and … (wait for it) … eating a sandwich. 

“Babe! Are you getting Presley?!”

His eyes widen in horror, mid-chew. I haven’t seen a grown man jump off a sofa like that since Tom Cruise on the set of Oprah. Brett bolts out the front door while I frantically text the teacher back.

Ten minutes later, Presley pops her head out in the backyard, all smiles, seemingly unfazed.

“Pres! Were you freaking out when you didn’t see mommy or daddy at pick-up?” I ask her, genuinely curious if she had cried.

“Not really,” she shrugs, “Sometimes I dream of living at kindergarten!”

My darling, precious third child. I tell her this little mishap is actually a rite of passage, explaining that we have also forgotten to pick up her brothers in the past. As in, both of them. As in, more than once. Unarguably, the worst being that one time we forgot to pick up Carson and he was left standing outside … (wait for it) … in the rain.1

Just last night, on a group text with friends, we had finally agreed on our next dinner date—September 19th—when one of the moms texted an hour later, “Omg I don’t know how I didn’t realize this, but 9/19 is my son’s birthday ☠️.”

She felt TERRIBLE, but I’m going to go out on a limb here and say she probably felt a little less terrible after I confessed our pick-up mishap 24 hours later.

I laugh now, but make no mistake: my new-mom self would be horrified by this.

Other things she’d probably be horrified by:

-the amount of beige food we call “dinner”
-all the character t-shirts
-number of days between baths/showers
-the record-setting hours of screen time we permitted over the summer

… and probably 400 other inconsequential things I’ve lowered my standards on.

I don’t know about you, but once upon a time, choosing the “right” baby fingernail clippers felt like The Biggest Decision of My Life. I worried about so many things. Choking hazards. Sleep schedules. Making sure the bath water temperature was Goldilocks perfect. Do you know how many times I Googled whether it’s normal for your baby not to poop for seven days?2

Some days I wondered: will there ever come a day where every fiber of every second is not wholly and completely consumed by motherhood? I cannot even fathom what I would have said if someone had told me back then: One day in the not-so-distant future, you will (very very very occasionally) forget to pick up your children from school. Even more unthinkable? They will laugh about it—and so will you.

Rest assured, darling, the kids are gonna be alright.

(Two out of three even clip their own fingernails now!)

Feel free to share your latest parenting snafus in the comments. I’d love to hear. Also, consider this your friendly reminder to set those pick-up alarms! (Especially for early release days! 🫠)

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And now, onto the links!

Currently reading and/or just finished reading: Beartown (WOW), Funny Story, The Women (another wow), Just For the Summer, Home Made, Tired of Being Tired, The Husbands (so weird and quirky — in a fun way), Write Your Story, and Darling Girls (this book was disturbing on so many levels … but I also couldn’t put it down).

Speaking of books! I’d love to offer an enthusiastic shoutout to these personal friends of mine whose books I’ve had the privilege to both read and endorse this year: Feel by Anjuli Paschall, Sacred Creativity by Jena Holliday, and The Unplugged Hours by Hannah Brencher. ALL OF THESE BOOKS ARE WONDERFUL.

What a simple, powerful phrase: “This isn’t working anymore.”

I have yet to write about that one time I flew to Germany on a whim to see Taylor Swift, but Ruth captured it perfectly: “The entire whirlwind trip was a collaborative artist date. A living adventure. An enchanting, whimsical, once-in-a-lifetime grand gesture in the name of art.”

While I am not currently nursing an injury, I still felt convicted by Megan’s words about being a good steward (of ourselves).

I can’t stop thinking about this breathtakingly beautiful piece by my friend Becky.

Look, I’m not a crazy coupon lady but I am willing to search high and low for a good promo code. I’ve been using the Honey chrome extension for YEARS and according to my profile, I’ve saved $557 using their discount codes. 🤯 Shop smarter, not harder!

Me at the 7th grade back-to-school night: “Hey moms I barely know, ahem, *clears throat* *nervous laughter* … anyone else want to start a coalition, cause a ruckus, and fight for a school-wide cell phone ban? Anyone?” (I’m taking notes here & here.)

Shoutout to every other 38-year-old woman currently in her 17th denim crisis of 2024. I recently wandered into a J. Crew Factory store when I had 30 minutes to kill and tbh my expectations were below zero because I haven’t bought anything from J. Crew in—I don’t know—eight years? Lo and behold: this pair fit like a dream. So did this one. And they were each only $49 (!).3

Speaking of saving $$—I am completely enthralled by this lady’s budget grocery hauls. I went alllllllll the way down the rabbit hole that is her YouTube channel and I don’t know that I’ve ever been more inspired to stretch a dollar at Trader Joes.

The Writing Off Social podcast has been on my radar for a while, but I keep forgetting to listen to it. This episode turned out to be the perfect entry point because they basically shared all their takeaways / best nuggets of wisdom from every episode over the past season. Tons of gold packed into one hour and it made me want to listen to their entire archive.

I love a good throw-on-and-go dress and just scooped this up on sale.

Someone commented recently that I wear a lot of (literal) hats and I wasn’t sure if it was an observation or a diss 😜 FWIW: I wear a lot of hats because I’m too lazy to wash my hair and bangs are Very High Maintenance. If you are also in the lazy hair club—this is my favorite “cute” hat for the fall.

Shameless Plugs // ICYMI

There have been a handful of moments in my life where I have been on the receiving end of something so intensely lavish, so extravagant, so over-the-top, I am completely unmoored by it. Those moments when you think, This is too good to be true. Those moments when you think, I don’t deserve this. Those moments where the only response is bewilderment, awe, and straight-up astonishment. // from Taste & See

Also — If I may be so bold … fall is a great time to rediscover your creativity & start a book club!

That’s all I’ve got. What are you reading? Wearing? Cooking? Watching? Tell me everything! Are you also crushing parenting (in the ironic sense)? Tell me about that, too.

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Quick disclaimer: My Substack is always free to read! I use affiliate links in posts like this, which occasionally gives me a teeny tiny kickback if you buy something. Rest assured: I only recommend stuff I genuinely love.